::GIVE ME::

When the body it yearns

And the mind doesn’t learn

And were all just taking turns

What is it that you actually earned


So do you miss me 

When it’s all too risky

What do you wish me

More of the pain that you give me

Give me give me give me 


Painfully looking at our pictures

Were either victims or victors

They asked if I missed her

They ask if my hearts been injured


So do you miss me 

When it’s all too risky

What do you wish me

More of the pain that you give me

Give me give me give me


When sunshines don’t reach 

Blowing winds on an empty beach

What do broken hearts teach

More than the words of love can speak 


So do you miss me 

When it’s all too risky

What do you wish me

More of the pain that you give me

Give me give me give me


How could it all end shattered

Betrayed and souls battered 

I wish I could just ask her 

Was it us or did you only matter 


So do you miss me 

When it’s all too risky

What do you wish me

More of the pain that you give me

Give me give me give me

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::GOING PLACES::

Everywhere I look

It’s a hard reminder 

Gave all I could 

But I couldn’t find her 

And the time stops 

It starts up when I think

Till the bottom drops

The end of where we begin


(chorus)

Going places 

With no direction 

Knowing faces

With no intentions

My memory chases

The slowly fading and resting


Unanswered questions

Worlds spinning in our view

My minds clouded and jaded 

Just knowing you hate it

I saw it all before it happened 

Words not matching their actions

We fabricate and elaborate

But efforts go like a past date 


(chorus)

Going places 

With no direction 

Knowing faces

With no intentions

My memory chases

The slowly fading and resting



Our time is winding

No perfect timing 

The clocks hands are blinding

Inching up and climbing

Losing thoughts and crying

Lost in our silver linings 

::WORSE CONCERNS::

I knew I couldn’t stay

It was coming to an end

Wasn’t much for us to say

Now I’m losing my only friend


Windows blurred discreetly

Tears running down freely

Stuck even with my feet beneath me 

Wishing you could believe me


(Chorus)

And we all need to be needed 

And we all just seem defeated 

Blinded even if we could see it

Sad love songs being repeated


Are you lost now

With nowhere to go

Wondering how

Standing with no hand to hold


Windows blurred discreetly

Tears running down freely

Stuck even with my feet beneath me 

Wishing you could believe me


(Chorus)

And we all need to be needed 

And we all just seem defeated 

Blinded even if we could see it

Sad love songs being repeated


The tables turnt

The lessons learnt 

The heart it burns

For just our worse concerns

::SOUL IS MISSING::

Distance distance distance 

It’s my persistence 

My hearts resistance

Through painful conditions

In looking for beautiful visions

Cloudy decisions

Topsy turvy intuition

Just wishful thinking

For what the soul is missing. 

::DEEPER::

Where do we take

Love after it breaks

Trust and we’ve been lost

In the cusp of thinking of us 

The rush slows down

The heart beats were so loud 

As drums could beat 

Lost awake in a sleep 

And reality did seem 

As if you could rewrite a dream

Unraveled at the seams 

Redeemed a coupon for a new

Life in seek of the truth 

Beneath the lies assumed 

Consumed by the universe

Maybe it could be us

in another world

Where I saw diamonds and pearls

Designed on the perfect girl 

Whirlwinds and I take off 

No direction and I stay lost 

Finding my way when fate calls

No days off I took years already

Heart heavy and…

You’re..

All..

Hiding.. 

Never.. 

Zealously.. 

Yielding anything of a deeper meaning. 

::IN THE CLOUDS::

To know my story

Hold my hand

Through my defeats and glory

To this pain and struggle

To the moments I loved you…

What are these words to me?

What do I mean?

Acknowledgment

You don’t know yet the obvious 

To listen to what the object is

The problem is

Understanding my problem lives

Deep within my soul

No answers 

Questions of growing old

I know to look back you won’t find

What has been in front of you the whole time

My mind flutters like a birds wings

Flying away from the worst things

Guitar strings playing in my background

I finally understand my dad now

Can after can 

Drowning in his and this stress aloud 

Still I’m alive with my head in the clouds. 

::SHOULDER TATTOOS::

I knew I couldn’t save the world/
I just knew I couldn’t save this girl/
And you were a pearl somewhere in a shell trapped/
A life of pain…
I guess that’s all we could attract/
And that’s a fact and I guess were so much alike/
But different in many ways I guess I just saw the light/
I couldn’t write about it cause I’ll never understand it/
Apologize for what he did that led to that bad habit/
You came 15 years too late for me to grasp it/
And my empathy and understanding were no source of magic/
In fact it… Left me with much of your damage/
No panic… I been here before and reached up to be alive/
To be in life with your condition…
A damaged vision/
But you can’t self medicate a traumatic living/
I hate them all for putting you in this position/
I can’t imagine your inner demons telling you to listen/
And I know now it really wasn’t truly your decision/
I’m thinking you think I was always ready to fold/
But you should know your mistakes will rest in my soul/
Life takes a toll on each of us so we must forgive/
For most of us life was stole before we could really live/
Delirium and psychosis/
Depression and losing all your focus/
No hope for loving the hopeless/
Lost souls seeking revenge from the soulless/
Trying to find redemption in the high of the dope biz/
Maybe your reincarnation will leave you so bliss/
And I know in that next lifetime we can be just know this/
May the Angels of The Lord protect us and show this/
I was wrong but I know I couldn’t belong and that’s why I wrote this/
Just another tattoo on shoulders.

::MY LIFE::

When people assume it’s only because they fear the truth/
I guess my words are my actions…
See all that it’s lead me to/
Clawing tooth and nail in a world where I’m destined to fail/
Dreaming every night on when these dreams a set sail/
We all have our tales I’m just best to describe mine/
I’m sure we all have pain in our lives… Just look at my lines/
Tough times in rough rhymes patterned behind emotional crimes/
I was designed a little different/
I’ve come a long way from being a misfit/
But it’s that childhood I think back to and I miss it/
The innocence is long place away and too far to visit/
Listen… My imperfections make me perfect for me/
But again nothing is perfect no matter how hard you believe/
We… Can be betrayed and deceived by the ones we need/
Truth indeed… Life longs can become for life gone/
I guess we can let bygones be bygones/
But really who is the judge of our right and wrongs/
I’m not trying to write a song but a symphony of life/
And I’m not looking for pity or validation in anyone’s eyes/
Because they wish for your pain through their sympathy of lies/
And I’ve cried a million rain storms sitting alone/
And I’ve been a shoulder for tears to rain on/
I’ve been the consoled and consoler/
I guess if you understand their pain it makes you tougher/
More so to a stranger than a sister or brother/
I take cover in solitude at times to hide from reality/
Because I could never imagine all this sadness and tragedy/
But I learned in hugs they were backstabbing me/
And I held on tighter to them…Don’t be mad at me/
Don’t be sad for me… Be happy for me actually/
Because nobody fake could ever pass for me/
And my past is my past so don’t ask if this love will last in me/
Cause I’m standing tall in the face of blasphemy/
With no hate in my heart so I know I’m living passionately.

::HERE::

35 years and I’m right here
Through the wrongs and the rights here
Through every single word that I write here
Through the darkness and what I might fear
Through the shine of my soul and the light here
Feelings expressed and though they might hear
Had a few backs turned thought they might care
Still believing in my dreams after a few nightmares
So I still put all my hope in my days and my nights there
Still talking to The Lord and I know that Christ’s here
Keeping me strong through the cries here
Keeping me where I belong away from the lies here
Circle getting smaller with people falling out of my sphere
But it’s 35 years and I’m right here and I’ll make it quite clear
No matter what happens good or bad I’m truly alive here.